Chapter 3
Prev Chapter PART THREE The green liquid frothed, hurling waves against its surroundings as though attempting to escape. Tiny, gelatinous tentacle-like structures poked out from beneath the foam and struck out at the containment unit, to no avail. All the while Dr. Maxwell looked on, his pencil flying across his notepad to denote his every observation as he hummed the Jeopardy theme to himself bemusedly. “Been watching a lot of game shows lately, sir?” asked a sudden voice from behind the scientist. His pencil snapped. Maxwell quickly turned around, coming face to face with a woman wearing glasses and a lab coat. He was sure that he hadn’t seen her around before, as she seemed a bit too young and attractive to be one of the scientists working on the project. He didn’t mind. “Oh, ah, you surprised me there, ma’am,” he stuttered. “You seem new to the research center. Can I help you with anything?” “Actually, yes,” she replied firmly, her gaze drifting from the scientist to the green liquid whirling in a glass container above his head. “I’ve been drafted from another government research center to work on something called ‘animadversionite’, but I still haven’t gotten a straight answer regarding what exactly that name refers to. I was told to see you regarding a supplemental briefing…?” “Hmm, sounds like whoever handled your transferal didn’t have the right security clearance…” said Dr. Max, rubbing his chin contemplatively. “Yes, I’m sure I can be of service. You see that liquid up there?” She nodded, crossing her arms. “So this is - ?” “Actually, no,” the scientist continued, walking abruptly to another corner of the room. “What you see up there is merely a 0.25% animadversionite solution, which I am currently boiling in order to observe its reactions. As I’m sure you can already tell, even in small quantities its properties are quite spectacular.” Dr. Maxwell paused before a wall-mounted control pad. After he punched a few keys, a hatch in the floor not far from where the woman was standing opened to reveal an elevating platform. Upon it was the Animadversionite, the same chunk retrieved by Edge, though already it had been chiseled down to about half its original size. “The first thing you should keep in mind in regards to Animadversionite is that it is extremely dangerous,” Maxwell continued, reaching for a box from a shelf. “I’d advise at least wearing gloves when dealing with or even observing the substance at close proximity.” He fished some latex gloves from the box and tossed them to the woman, who deftly caught them. “Dangerous, you say,” she said as she slipped on the gloves. “What exactly do you mean by ‘dangerous’, doctor?” “Well, it’s not radioactive or anything like that,” he replied, grabbing another pencil from the same shelf. “I’m not sure there’s even a word available for exactly what the compound is. Still, animal studies have shown that even minor contact with the substance can result in notable hormonal and reflexive aberrations.” “I see,” she answered slowly, “and what of more major contact? Could this be employed as some sort of biochemical weapon?” The scientist laughed as he stepped back to his original spot. “Do you think we’d get the funding for all this top-of-the-line equipment if our research wasn’t related to the military? I haven’t received orders to commence full-blown testing as a weapon just yet, but it’s my personal theory that if this kind of volatile mutagenic substance were allowed to pierce and really soak into an organic subject, it would cause massive tissue damage and ultimately deteriorate the organism from the inside.” Maxwell’s eyes turned once again towards the dancing green liquid above him. “Of course, that’s just a theory… and really, there are many more useful applications for this kind of material. If we can hammer out all the problems and harness its mutagenic properties, we could have the makings of a sort of ‘super-soldier’ formula here. No matter the case, I’m sure we’ll have a weapon developed for the government soon that no other nation in the world will be able to match.” He heard a clicking sound from behind him, and the young woman hissing in a chilling new voice: “I’m afraid I disagree, doctor.” There was a loud bang, and a terrible pain seared through Maxwell’s right arm. The doctor dropped to the floor, screaming wildly. “B-b-but the lock… the security system…” Maxwell spluttered, pointing a shaking finger at the grinning woman who now held a pistol in one of her gloved hands. “Oh God, where did you…? She laughed coldly at the bleeding scientist as the scooped the Animadversionite from its pedestal. “I don’t believe I’ve introduced myself, Doctor Maxwell,” she started, ignoring his desperate pleas. “My name is Guenhwyvar. I am an agent of the WPN spy network, and an assassin by trade. I was sent here to claim the Animadversionite for our cause, and to kill anyone who tried to stop me.” The spy dropped her prize into a small bag beneath her lab coat, then walked towards the pitiful bleeding scientist on the floor. She delivered a prompt kick to his stomach, sending him rolling into the wall. He became bathed in the glow of the liquid Animadversionite stirring above, giving Guenhwyvar an idea. “Do not despair, doctor,” she cackled, “I am not without mercy. I shall grant you one last experiment before I depart. You shall observe the effects of gallons of dangerous boiling liquid upon a human body… namely, your own.” Maxwell began to beg for his life, but it was too late. Another shot rang out, and he was swallowed by the scalding liquid from above. His vision swam with green and red, and his ears were filled with his own desperate screams. And then, after what felt like eons of pain and horror… Doctor Maxwell’s mind returned to the theme from Jeopardy. --- “We have no idea how it happened, sir,” the officer frantically explained to superior, as the two marched through the facility’s hallways. “We had security posted all over the building, cameras everywhere… the damn doors can’t even be opened without a combination! But the bastard even managed to seal the door behind him, so it took hours before we could…” “I don’t need your excuses, I need information,” DR barked, obviously quite pissed. “What do we know about this guy? Do we have any witnesses?” “Well... he mostly left corpses, actually,” the security manager sheepishly replied. “This was obviously a skilled assassin, one well-versed in stealth and espionage.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, you know, Doctor Maxwell technically a witness to all of this, but...” “Have him sent to the scene of the theft at once,” DR said as he approached the blown-open door to the room himself. “I want to know exactly who this person was so I can have every gun on the goddamn planet pointed at his head by tomorrow.” “He’s… already at the scene of the crime, sir,” answered the manager. “But it’s sort of complicated, sir, you see…” The Regulator pressed on into the laboratory from which the Animadversionite had been stolen, intent on getting to the bottom of the debacle himself. He found it strange that the room was dark, and not teeming with investigating personnel. The equipment and machinery being used to study the Animadversionite were scattered across the room’s floor. On the far side of the room, a human arm floated in a pool of blood. “Jesus Christ,” he whispered to himself, “the assassin ripped off a guy’s arm…?” “I AM TAKING OBJECTION TO YOUR STATEMENT I THINK?” cried a voice from the rafters. DR looked up to see a strange man with glowing eyes, ensconced in shadow and crouching in the rafters. “IT IS NOT OF ANY GOOD ONCE HAVING BULLET INSIDE! So I tore it off myself and made a new one. Epic win!!” DR raised an eyebrow. “Doctor Maxwell? Is that you?” “MY NAME IS NOT OF BEING THE MAXWELL,” the man shouted from behind his metal mask. As if to punctuate his statement, he launched a sphere of strange green energy towards the ground, singing the floor next to DR’s feet. “I’ve already told everyone, my name is Alex Trebek. You know, like from Jeopardy? I’m basically that guy now! Except I don’t have the mustache. Also I’m half machine.” DR’s mind spun, searching for an exit to this bizarre encounter. “So, uh, I just wanted to know if… you remember who took the Animadversionite? You know, the… the shiny green stuff?” The mad doctor leapt from the ceiling with a roar, landing beside a piece of machinery which he proceeded to beat into scrap metal with his bare hands. “I AM OF HATING THAT BITCH!” he cried, ripping a thick cord in two with his newly-constructed cyborg hand. “Guenhwyvar of the WPN spy network? MORE LIKE HER MOM. Who I will have non-consensual sex with possibly?” The Regulator smiled – he was smart enough to know when to exploit an opportunity. “Tell me, Trebek… how would you like a chance to get back at this Guenhwyvar?” Trebek blinked his metal eyelids. “Are you calling me gay?” he whispered. “Um, no. No, I’m not doing that,” the Regulator replied. “Then it’s settled!” Alex replied. “LET THE BEGINNING OF BATTLE BE STARTING OF YES?” "Yes," DR replied, "let the battle commence." 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